There are some things that shouldn’t have ever happen. Ever. Such terrible things include but not limited to: Cats dressed up like hitler, the movie Beverly Hills Chiuaua, and Jar Jar Binks.

When I received this ad through an email from TiVo, explaining how they’ve completely revolutionized the laziest possible way to order food, I thought to myself, “Sure. I’ll give it a hearty go for the economy.” So I did.

First off, my wife and I have made many a Domino’s pick up and deliveries. We normally get a medium hand tossed pizza with onions, order of chicken kickers, and a garden fresh salad. The total for pick up usually lands us right around the $24 mark. Delivery with tip, I would say around $28 if it’s here under 30 min, $30 if I had a good day or if it’s raining (not because I’m concerned about the driver’s safety but because I love the rain. What. I’ll be honest).

Okay so here we go. Hit the TiVo button. Navigate to the Music, Photos, & Showcases. Alright, Order Domino’s® Pizza Now.

Good. I’m gonna create my own here.

Pick the size and crust, check. 1 pizza, check.

Apparently you can do half orders with ‘left’ or ‘right’. If I order sausage on the left it BETTER be on the fucking left and NOT the right, otherwise that delivery guy ain’t getting a tip. 

Order my fabulous Buffalo Chicken Kickers®.

The wife likes the Garden Fresh Salad.

Okay so what do we got. Mind you, if we ordered this by phone it should be around $24. Medium hand tossed pizza with onions, 10-piece order of chicken kickers, and a garden fresh salad making for a grand total of……..

$30?! WTF!

Is there a convenience charge in there for being completely lazy and avoiding all human interaction?! What’s up with this ‘delivery charge’? So basically what this is telling me is if I wanted to waste $10 on an order I should do it through TiVo and not manhandle a telephone like some beltless peasant. Frankly, if we go pick it up, I think they should pay us instead.

Nice job, TiVo. Way to suck the life out of everything good Domino’s had to offer online.

Photo courtesy of Chanelle Richardson

Original file found here:
www.flickr.com/photos/iamchanelle/3201643178/

12/14-12/21 MakingFoodEatingFood.wordpress.com

I’ve never been a big fan of making food. I think it’s a pain and a time waster.

When I do cook though, I find  the process enjoyable.. but I need to plan ahead of time. I’m constantly on-the-go or knee-deep in work, so I’m always looking for a quick food fix that will get me through the day. I have to dive right into it all and not think about how much time it will take from my schedule. I usually brush off attempts to indulge in a tasty self-satisfying culinary creation and end up half-sated when I choose quick food I can eat at my desk or in the car – if I’m not on the way to a dinner.

What has potential to turn my cooking habits around is this delightfully delicious blog I discovered. This site has a refreshingly unique approach to inspire photography and/or cooking with just a passing glance. It is Chanelle’s blog, MakingFoodEatingFood.

I’ll be honest, the best part is the photography. The writing style and recipes are great too, but the photos captured by Chanelle will wrap your taste buds around each word and bring the images to life to where you feel like you can taste the photos. Reminder: don’t eat your screen.

What will surprise you is the entries aren’t always about food. I believe all blogs need a personal flavor and she adds just a touch of seasoning from her personal life every so often, creating a unique and entertaining experience for the visitor. Just by reading a few minutes you’ll get the feeling you were friends in high school or grew up in the same neighborhood.

I have been passionate about food since I was born. The first thought in my head upon waking? “What’s mom making for dinner tonight?” I spent much of my youth poring over cookbooks and time-worn recipe cards, envisioning each creation as made by my own hands, with my own additions, changes and flair.

You really have to look over the 23 pages Chanelle has offered up to the internet gods and take some deliciousness home for yourself.

Set the table and preheat to awesome.

11/23-11/29 nikibone.com

Thanksgiving is here. Today, millions of people across the red and blue states will be cooking the traditional American recipe as more delicious turkeys succumb to the yearly festivities of the human race. Approximately 68% of Thanksgiving munchers will feel satisfied with the quality of their dinner, while 26% wished they ate at Black Angus, 6% were undecided. Why? Because amateurs screw up the cooking process and ruin all that is good for family and friends on this once a year holiday of eating and shopping! I just made that up. It could be true, I don’t know.

What I do know is cooking in a crock-pot takes 2% skill, leaving you with a 98% success rate on the deliciousness scale. It is very very difficult to eff up a recipe once you turn the dial on one of these beauties, plus it’s the safest cooking method allowing for drinking games, play time with the kids, or surfing for porn on the interwebs. I do not condone all 3 at once.

As to who Nikibone is, I don’t really want to know. Handsomely, she’s got a mean list of crock-pot recipes on this page of her site which why it is my site of the week: http://nikibone.com/recipe/crockpot.html

It’s not the prettiest of sites to look at, but use that command-f or alt-f or whatever on your ‘puter to find the dish you’re craving and you’ll get a simple set of instructions in addition to all you’ll need to make your culinary dreams come true.

Below are 27 turkey crock-pot recipes for Thanksgiving:

01. Cabbage with Turkey Kielbasa

02. Barbecued Turkey and Vegetables

03. Cherry Pineapple Turkey Roast

04. Chili Turkey

05. Five Spice Turkey Thighs

06. Herbed Turkey Breast

07. Savory Turkey Breast

08. Southwest Crock Pot Turkey Loaf

09. Southwest Turkey Tender Loin Stew

10. Tarragon Mustard Turkey with Linguine

11. Three Ingredient Turkey

12. Turkey Breast

13. Turkey Breast2

14. Turkey Breast with Cranberry Sauce

15. Turkey Cassoulet

16. Turkey and Bean Cassoulet

17. Turkey Chop Suey

18. Turkey in Cream Sauce

19. Turkey Dinner

20. Turkey Meatballs in Lemon Sauce

21. Turkey Ragout

22. Turkey and Rice

23. Turkey Soup

24. Turkey Teriyaki Sandwiches

25. Turkey Tetrazzini.htm

26. Turkey Vegetable Chili Mac

27. Wild Rice Stuffed Turkey Breast

It happened.

For all of you hungry folk that enjoy limited human contact while ordering food, you can now place Domino’s orders from your comfortable couch on your Tivo. I don’t know the extent of which ordering capabilities are available as of yet, but when I do I’ll document my fantastic ordering experience here.

Check out what other cool stuff Domino’s is doing.